Panama

Due to a lot hatred comment on my blog for absent of posting, I figure I should write something about my first missionary trip. Looking from the pictures, we looked like we are staying in luxury hotel and just having fun and we were. It is not the usual mission trip that people have in mind, like going into remote places and helping them to improve living environment. It is none of that. This trip is to help out in an English camp and most of the kids who came are sort of well off cause the camp is kind of expensive to their living standard. But we didn't get to just sit around and have fun. In fact, the camp is so unorganized that makes a lot of us very frustrated and stressed. Things keep changing last minute. And it was very draining mentally too cause we have to be with our kids 24/7. And yet, I think the experience touched each and every one of us in different way. I never experience lives or see lives this way before. May be some of the kids' families are pretty well off, but it is not like they got spoiled and just sat around do nothing. I am the spoiled one. A lot of them have to help in family business when they get off school. One of my girls spent all her free time working. She doesn't get to hang out with friends at all. The camp is her only social life. A lot of them have more burden than I ever see. Broken relationship, death, threat. One of the girl's bf die when she was in the camp. And a lot of the kids actually know him too. Another girl got stalked by her gangster ex-bf in the camp and he threaten to kill one of the girl in my class. Some of them got mislead to work in Panama and thinking that they are going to the state. Now they have to work to pay off the debt for sponsoring them over. To them, coming to Canada/US is a paradise. A lot of them are just looking for love and friendship in the camp which they don't find in their own home. They experienced way more than I ever when I was 16. It is not something we watch from TV. It is life that I never see before. They sadden me. At first I was very nervous to meet them cause I never work with kids before. And the fact that you have to bond with them and get them open up seem like an impossible job. I am very glad things work out. I met a lot of friends, though they are way way younger than me. I enjoyed their company a lot and they would really open up to you. I also met good friends from the short mission members too, despite they keep picking on me. I also get to know people from my church better. I never hang out with the younger group. Through this trip, I am glad I get to know more of them. Last but not least, I have never been this focus on God before. This trip really help me focus and experience His presence. I know I always say serving Him, but I know deep down I basically take up the job because nobody feel like doing it. It is a job focus, not God focus. But this trip, really help me to put the perspective on Him and see how His work is done. I know He touched each and every one of us in different way. There was a calling during the call for full time ministry. I did sign for that. I didn't know it was full time ministry till later. I was a bit scared of what I got myself into. But now I know if that is what my calling for and thru me, God can do His work. I am willing to take up the work. This was a very meaningful trip for me and I sure hope someday I could be back.