Saving

I would never ever list my expenses again. Not only now I felt depress about paying all those bills, I now also feel stress about how to save money. With all my utility and mortgage, I don't have much left. Even if I want to save a tiny amount, I have to really control my spending. I got so stressful even just thinking about it. I am thinking about area that I want to cut. One person doesn't really need to watch that many channels. And since I only watch couple hours a day anyway, I really should consider cutting it down and just have basic cable. It would save me tons there. And my coffee and lunch money. I am not sure I am ready to give it all up entirely. But may be I could limit myself on each day spending. I am also very tempted to give up my tithing. That is a fair amount that I could put good use to. I know it is like stealing from God, but that amount really makes such a difference. I don't know if that mean I am lack of faith. I should just take that step of faith and give and trust that God will provide enough for me. And I know it is not a life-and-death situation that I need those money for, but I really want some liquidity asset. I know that is not a good reason to stop tithing. And I know tithing should be from the heart and not an obligation. How come I still feel bad about cutting that then?!