Does Anybody Hear Her

I came across this video while surfing the web. Very powerful lyrics. It was a good reminder for me on how we all just too self-absorbed in our own problem and get too comfortable with our own friends but forgot about the people around us. As a church, we are no longer approachable but rather just show people that they are different.

Food from Beijing

This is a Chinese style crepe I got from the street. They wrap some crunchy stuff inside the crepe and put lots of sauce in. Yummy breakfast for freezing morning.
I ordered this noodle from a Muslim restaurant (I went in for the lamb kebab). This tasted a bit like noodle with very watery tomato sauce.
Mushroom with pine nut from Quanjude restaurant. Very tasty but I wonder if they used duck fat to add the extra tastiness :)
It is sushi. That is right. I ate sushi in Beijing. This was my dinner after meeting with my cousin. He suggested several places around his university. Since I wanted something light, I went to a Japanese restaurant. I ordered a salmon don and hoping that it would remotely taste something like Maruwa. And it was not. It had no taste at all and was expensive. The beer was cheap though (only RMB 12 for a big bottle of Asahi). I found out later that this was not the restaurant that my cousin recommended. Oh well, too late.
And I had Korean food in Beijing :) I found that I was a bit tired of Chinese food but I don't know if I could find good western food in China. I was actually craving for a grilled cheese panini when I found this Korean restaurant. Turned out quite surprising good. I ordered a spicy tofu hotpot and it was pretty yummy. Warmed me up to finish my walk.

Sunday Sermon

I found out that there is a church around my hostel. I was kind of surprised because I was staying in the older part of Beijing and I totally didn't expect that there is a church. So I decided to attend the Sunday service as usual. They have 4 different time and given that I am a lazy bum these days, I picked the 11am one (I could have gone to the 7pm one!!!) The most interesting thing is the pastor wasn't even there physically. They have TV set and they are just playing the video tape of a pastor preaching in another location. I found it quite interesting. I thought I may know some of the hymn back from the elementary school years, but apparently not. There are a lot of different age group in the church, even some like grandma ages. The pastor preached in Chinese. I already have difficulties with listening to Mandarin and listening to sermon in Chinese is another challenge. I soon started to zone out :P I felt a bit bad because my neighbors were all madly taking notes and my mind wandered off to thinking where to go next. I should have search for an English sermon and may be that would be easier for me not zzzz :P

Beijing Duck

Since I was travelling alone, I wasn't sure if I should go eat Beijing Duck. But then everyone keep saying that is something you can't miss. I figure why not. So I went to the most famous place Quanjude Roast Duck Restaurant (全聚德) for lunch one day. I ordered half a duck and a veggie dish since I haven't eat anything green for like....7 days :(. I actually found it quite disappointing. The veggie dish I order was actually quite tasty. But the whole time I kept wondering if they use duck fat to cook the mushroom cause everything on the menu seems to contain duck. Then came the main dish. They first gave me a small dish of skin only. I had two pieces. I swear that those two pieces could have given me a heart attack. IT IS ALL GREASE! And it doesn't even have much taste. All I can taste is oil. Then the rest of the duck. You have to order the side dish separately. So I only order wrap and sauce. The duck meat is actually quite dry. I was not very impressed after all, especially it is the most famous restaurant. I think I make a better duck than them :P The whole meal cost me RMB 200. I almost cried when I paid and want a refund.

Forbidden City

The first day in Beijing I chose to go to Forbidden City. Mainly because A, I really want to go there and spend as much time as I want. And B, I know exactly how to get there so I don't need to look up a map or anything :) Though after Chengde, I was a bit afraid that I would be disappointed in Forbidden City as well. But I ended up spending two days there.

I picked up one of the audio guide so I could learn more about each place and still travel at my own speed. I didn't find out till the next day that if you get the Mandarin one it is cheaper (RMB 40 vs RMB 10) and it has more detail description. It is an automatic machine so it picked up the signal when you are in the area. The annoying thing is the machine is very sensitive. It picks up the signal even though you are not at the place yet. So there was one time I was in washroom and my stooopid machine started talking!!!

I successfully avoided to use the Chinese washroom in Chengde because my hotel was very closed to everywhere. But I didn't get the luxury in Forbidden City unless I wanted to kill my bladder. The ones in Forbidden City is actually 4 stars :P The only challenging thing is to go to washroom with your day pack and wearing a down jacket. I bet the cleaning lady must think I drowned in there somehow because it took me a freaking 15 minutes to get out the stall. :P

If I complained about how few tourists in Chengde, then Beijing is PACKED with tourist everywhere. There are tour groups from everywhere around the world. I ran into a group of Japanese girls on the first day. The interesting thing is they all wear kimono. I didn't dare to go ask why but I did take a picture of them :)

The whole time I walked around listening to how each place is used, I keep thinking, how could ONE person use that much space! I always thought my tiny 700 square feet is pretty big for one person. But when you look at the Forbidden City, there is a hall for the emperor to dress, a hall for the emperor to prepare to enter the main hall, a hall...man, that is all for one person!! Another thing I found interesting is, how could the empress and concubines walk in those shoes back then. Here I was walking in my runner and I almost fall every now and then. And back then, their small feet....how could they even stand up?! and walk without falling head over heel?! I guess the same skill set that some ladies master to hike in high heel. :)

Eight Outer Temples

I spent the next day in Chengde to visit some of the temples in Chengde. It is supposed to be very famous because it is part of the Mountain Resort. I picked only two temples to go because I knew I wouldn't have enough time to go to all eight. I picked the largest one called Puning Temple(普宁寺). Unfortunately, I found it rather disappointing. It has one of the biggest Buddha statue which is two storey tall. But that is about it about the temple. And it cost me RMB60!!! Totally not worth it.


The only thing interesting is they have a "band" outside the main building. Whenever you donate RMB100, they play some music supposed to be wishing you luck. Other than that, it is relatively boring.



The second temple I went to is a resemble of the Potala Temple called Potuozongchenge Temple (普陀宗乘之庙). I found this one more interesting but unfortunately the weather wasn't very nice so I couldn't take a good picture of the place. The main temple has some "lama" to greet people. One of the lama in the temple was telling me he could preform some sort of trick so by looking into my eyes, he could tell my birthday and he and his master are the only two people in China that could do it. Another lama wanted to preform a ritual on me to wish my luck. Somehow that freak me out and I kind of ran out the door while keep saying no. Other than that, the temples are pretty much a rip-off.

Food from Chengde

Food is the most important part for my trip. I actually travel to eat. Here is some of the food I had in Chengde. Most of the time I just wander around and walk into a place where it has tons of people.

I didn't know that "seaweed wrapped rice" mean sushi! I felt I got ripped off. But then it is only RMB 12. I guess I can't complain.
The wonton is okay. Just pork. RMB 4 only. What more do you want!
Congee and steamed bun. I refused to stay in my hotel and paid RMB 15 for a breakfast buffet. Instead, I found this congee place next to my hostel. This is only RMB 4 :D
This is from a dumpling specialty store and it is seriously YUMMY dumpling. It is a bit more pricey though, RMB 30. But it is because of the content I picked. It is 桂花鱼 (a kind of fish but I don't know the English name). I would say this is well worth it! Just looking at the picture make my mouth water again :D
I was freezing my bum bum off while walking down the street so I decided to have hot pot for dinner. The waitress thought I was nut to eat hot pot by myself. I didn't order much though. Just lamb :) For some reason, they seem to use less sauce than what I am used to, but I guess peanut sauce is enough for lamb.

Mountain Resort

After I complained numerous times to my cousin for telling me to bring an extra thick jacket for my trip when Beijing is really just like Vancouver weather, my extra warm down jacket come in pretty handy in Chengde. I spent two days in Chengde to tour around and to be honest, I am quite disappointed the first day in Mountain Resort (避暑山庄). It is supposed to be a royal summer resort several hundreds years ago and it should be even prettier than the summer palace in Beijing. However, since it is fire hazard season, half the resort is closed. A lot of displayed only has Chinese explanation and they don't even have enough light on. Everything is so dark and old. Since it is not exactly travel season for Chengde, I am almost the only tourist in there. I wander around thinking if they closed the gate without checking to see if everyone left, would I be locked inside. However, the garden is extremely pretty. You can see the people put a lot of effort to make sure all the scenery tied together. And then you have to wonder how can people be that rich (I know it is a royal resort) and have so much time. I wish I could retire like that!

Bus Mates

I met this couple Alan and Linda, on my bus ride to Chengde. It was a 15 people minibus and they keep talking in English. Linda was actually knitting the whole way too!!! Eventually I was curious enough to talk to them. They are from San Francisco and will be here for a month. They already been to DaTong and PiuYiang (I was so excited when they told me that cause that was the place I was going to go originally but have to change my plan because lack of time) and will spend next few days in Beijing. They were commenting the reckless driving of our minibus driver. It is kind of reckless and I am glad I wasn't sitting in the front cause I would totally freak out. It is a single lane highway. And whenever he want to pass people, he basically drive on the incoming traffic lane. It is okay if it is straight flat road. But we are talking about driving between mountain, where it is curvy and wavy. And it is not a quiet road. He basically would shift back to his lane LAST MINUTE before hitting the incoming car. I am glad I arrive in one piece and not knowing better. I am slightly disappointed that my bus ride didn't stop at the Great Wall, which my book said they would, or use the new highway which would only take 2.5 hours. But I guess my bus has a load of people wanting to go home. Once we arrived at Chengde, it seems like Alan and Linda are going to the same hotel as me. So we took the bus together. Since I am the person actually speak more and better :P Mandarin than either of them, I asked the bus driver where about we should took off. She said 6 bus stations. After stopping at 3-4 bus stations, I forgot exactly how many were there left. So I ask the lady beside me and she thought for a bit, and when the bus stopped, she quickly told me to get off HERE. I was like...errr....but...and without giving me anytime to to say anything, she dragged me off the bus and then showed me on the board at the bus station to take another bus that would take me directly to where I wanted to go. The problem now was that Alan and Linda were still on the bus and it was so crowded that they didn't see me get off. I haven't seen them since then. I hope they are okay. :(

Joy Ride

I decided to wait after the rush hour to take the subway with my backpack. The girl in hostel told me to go Xizhimen to catch the bus there. Silly me forgot to ask about the exact address and bus schedule. When I arrived at that subway station, no one seemed to know there is a bus to go to Chengde. So I tried to get closer to train station and tried to find if there is a long distance bus station to ask. I found a ticket booth next to a bus parking lot. The lady at the ticket booth told me the earliest ride to Chengde is 3:00pm, and it was 9am at that time! She also told me to go to Beijing station and they have an earlier ride. I quickly hopped onto the subway to go to Beijing station and was slightly annoyed with myself that I forgot to ask the bus schedule when I left the hostel. I took out my lonely planet and it mentioned there is two long distance bus station and have bus leaving every hour. Now I am in dilemma. Should I trust lonely planet, or try what that lady told me. I figured I had enough time to check out what the lady said first. And I was a bit worried that the lonely planet information is out of date since it is not travelling season. When I arrived at Beijing station, I found I made a bigger mistake. It is a HUGE station and I had no way to know where to find the bus station. I figure I would check the train schedule first since I am this close already. The lady at the ticket booth told me the earliest train is leaving at 12:30, which is exactly what the other lady at Beijing north station told me. I finally realized I have been talking to train ticket people the whole time!!! She gave me a very annoyed look and I figured I will get a ticket since I am here anyway. After I got my ticket, then I remembered that that train is actually that super slow train and it would take 6-7 hours to arrive compared to a 4 hour bus ride. Here I am standing at Beijing station again debating if I should suck up with my mistake, or really see if lonely planet is correct. Since I had another 2 hour to kill, I rather went check it out than standing at the bus station guarding my belonging. Once I arrived at one of the closer bus station that Lonely Planet mentioned, I found my bus. It is leaving at 11:30am and will take 4 hour. So after I wasted 2 subway ride ($2 each) and 1 train ticket ($20 and I should have refund it if I know better) and 3 hours of running around like a mad woman, I am on my bus to Chengde.

PS. I just checked the train schedule and apparently it is just a 5 hour ride for the ticket I got. I should have taken the train instead since the bus ride took closed to 5 hour anyway. Oh well.


PPS. What is a trip without me injuring myself. Here is the bruise I got from tripping in Beijing station while trying to figure the bus situation. I swear I will bring my hiking boot to travel next time. The whole time wearing my backpack, I feel that i will trip anytime. Good thing is that my laptop survived the fall with me landing on it :)

Starbucks Guide

Before I left for my vacation, my friends teased me how am I going to survive with no Starbucks in China. There was a 2 second panic and then I remembered reading something about Starbucks opened in Forbidden City. So I am sure there is Beijing at least have Starbucks. Today started off with me waking up at 4am because of the stoopid jet lag. After trying for an hour to go back to sleep, I gave up and did some reading and MSN. Then my coffee addiction kicked in. It was 6am in the morning. I didn't know if the Starbucks in Beijing open that early. I made use of my free Internet to find the closet store open at 9am! (why can't they open at 6am like Vancouver!) I figured I would go for a walk anyway cause I was starving already and I really didn't feel like eating another granola bar (Note to self, always bring granola bar to travel from now on. It saved me twice already on this trip :P) When I opened the hostel door to go out, there was a guy, Ryan standing wanting to stay at the hostel. But all the receptionist were still asleep at that hour. So he just dropped off his bag inside and walked with me. He happened to come back from a trip to Dalian and knew where the Starbucks around the hostel is!! My friend said I always have a weird instinct to find all the Starbucks. But never before that when I opened the door and boom, a Starbucks guide :p So we chatted a bit and apparently he is from St Louisiana and came to work in Shanghai for couple months. And now wanting to move to Beijing. He looked abit like my friend Wes but I didn't say that out loud. (sound too much like a pick up line). He studied architecture (I was going to say my cousin is doing that here too! but found that sound a bit weird too) and just trying out to live a different life. I found that quite interesting cause he apparently doesn't know a word of Chinese and not having any friends or relatives here and decided to just come and see. I guess he is still young to do that.

One World, One Dream

I arrived safely in Beijing and writing this from my hostel room. The flight was pretty uneventful. I was so tired from trying to get everything done for work the night before. I basically work the whole night and some extra time while waiting for boarding. My neighbor on the plane is a guy from Winnipeg going to Zhengzhou. (No, Ray. He is not hot. So keep praying :P) He was an okay neighbor until he decided to be talkative. He almost didn't shut up for the rest of the trip even though I put up the face that I am doing some serious reading (well, I guess you can't say reading "The Devil Who Wear Prada" seriously) I guess one good thing is I get to practice my long-lost super broken Mandarin.

Compared to last year in Vietnam, I am surprised when I walk out the airport, I wasn't surrounded by tons and tons of people asking if I want taxi or ride. In fact I was only approached by two people and once I said no, they leave me alone. Beijing is totally different than how I remember it. It has such a big cities feel now. Very metropolis like. People are different than I remember too. They are really polite and helpful. Compared to several years ago when I went to Shanghai, people actually lined up here. When I went out for dinner last night, I saw one of the traffic controller yelling at one of the biker who tried to run a red light. I am pretty amazed by that. You can actually follow traffic light (and other people do that too!) without worrying getting killed. Last time crossing the traffic was the biggest challenge for me in China. I guess at least in Beijing I won't be killed in car accident this time.

PS. The hostel I am staying is pretty neat. I will try to take some pictures in the morning.

Reckless

So my trip is coming up soon, real soon. Like this Sunday :) I am actually pretty excited about the whole trip. I have it all planned out (first time ever I am sooo organized before the trip!) Even when I talked to my friend on Saturday, I am very looking forward to my trip. There are so many things I want to see and China is always the place I really want to go and just wander around in all the historical places. Even my parents are super worried about me travelling by myself, they actually are the one who nag me the least. Some of my friends keep telling me horrid stories about robbery. When they found out I am planning to stay in a hostel in Beijing, they totally freak out (and the funny thing is my parents actually didn't :P) They keep saying why I am staying in hostel (cause it is cheaper :P) and why sharing room with people (cause it is cheaper and it is just another girl) They go on and on about hostel in China isn't like Europe. Though I understand they only care about my safety, I think I know what I am doing. When I travel by myself, I usually play it more safe too. So it is not like I would recklessly go around the cities to the unsafe area. And when I compared to my other friends, I am totally the safe traveller and can well take care of myself :) Tonight make me kind of miss my friends who I travelled with cause they would understand and just get excited for my trip :(

Purpose of Life

I finished watching a Japanese drama called "One Litre of Tears" last night in one go (which by the way is bad idea if you need to go to work the next day). The story is based on a real life story. A 15 years old girl was diagnosed spinocerebellar ataxia, a disease that the patient slowly lose the ability to move and talk and there is still no known cure. The drama basically showed the girl's life starting when she got diagnosed with the disease till she died. It is a very sad story cause her body started to deteriorate but yet she stayed conscious the whole thing. It is a very brutal disease. And then she started to wonder the purpose for her life. For us, it may be friends or family. But for her, her only focus is to stay alive. She questioned what is the point for staying alive when you can see your body slowly dying. What should be the purpose then? It is not even an easy life to live. Every movement you rely on someone to help you. Any moment now you can die from the smallest thing like eating or drinking. You lost control on everything that you take for granted. It is almost easier to die than live. Never give up, it is easier said than done. But yet she did. She found the purpose for her live and she tried her best to keep on living. Her courage really astounded me. I don't know if I am her, I would be to live like that. Now I am interested to read the original book which is the diary that the girl wrote during her years of sickness.

Super Fun Trip Planning

So I actually started planning my trip. Given that I am leaving in 3 weeks, it is "normal" for everyone to plan their trip, book the hotel, etc, etc. But not me. I usually do the planning on the plane :) What else can you do on the 8 hour flight? :) But this time, I actually started planning. Partly because my parents decide to tag on part of my trip. And I also want to take a look what I can do in China. Then I realize how big China really is!!! I mean I always know it is big, but every place I want to go take 6 hours train! :( I was searching online and reading people recommendation on places. And then I started to feel exhausted reading how long each places takes and 6 hours is already the short trip :( Now I realize I am really old! When I backpacked in Europe back then, overnight train is nothing! But now....Anyway I got more excited to read about all the places I haven't heard of. I started to re plan my whole trip. Now I regretted getting my Shanghai to HK flight ticket so early because I want to go to Xian instead. Oh well, I guess I will have to do another trip again :)

Accomplishment?

I have been thinking alot lately and I also got asked alot lately: how does I like being project manager compared to developer. I seriously don't know. I like the coordination work and feel that I am on top of things. But then I also miss the coding part. I feel that I don't use my brain anymore. I guess I am using more soft skill with people now instead. But then you don't feel a sense of accomplishment. When you finish working on a piece of code, you see that piece of code. But now when I finish replying email, I....replied the email. It just feel so lame on the accomplishment. The reason I keep thinking about this is that my customer requested that I quantify my work. I was like, how do you put "I reply email and handle whatever crap my architect doesn't feel like doing" in a nicer way. The more I think about it, I really don't know what I do. I go to meeting. I write meeting minute. I keep track of task and ask "nicely" if there is a delay. Now come to think about it, I feel I didn't really achieve anything.

PS. I found this link online while trying to quantify my work. I find that kind of funny. http://decker.typepad.com/welcome/2005/05/what_a_project_.html

Another Year Wiser :)

I think time flies by quicker than I ever remember. Before I realized, summer is already over and I am another year older. Wait. This year I decided I will stop aging. Actually I decide I will stay at certain age and just won't grow old. May be wiser every year, but not older! :) One of my friends refuse to grow older after 13. So compared to him, I think I am doing pretty good. There is nothing really exciting this year. Just hanging out with friends. Don't get me wrong. I had fun. Just lately I have been so stressed and tired so it is nice to have a break. And didn't get drunk this year. That is good too. And on my birthday I just ate with my parents. The most exciting part probably is I had been having a fight with them on various things. So the dinner was just "excellent" :) I guess you can never get parents to see you point of personal space and they can never get you to see their point of your lack of availability. So our conversation goes from how I am always busy to how uneager I was with them coming with me on my Beijing trip. Anyway, I still have some good chat with my friends. And my friend made me a Totoro cake. :) And I got some funky toys. :) It is all good :)

Friend Forever?

Ever regretted that you shut a friend out of your life? I never thought I would, but I do now. There was a friend that I was very closed to but we had a big fight way back then. Even though we reconcile after, but we lost our closeness. Every time we saw each other and we would nod and chat about random stuff, but we don't let each other into our lives anymore. I never thought I would regret that. Friends come and go. I lost this friend, but I made some other new friends. Who care about one? So some of us are trying to schedule dinner next week since we haven't seen each other for awhile. And today when I am chatting with my friend to check if my friend going. Then I realized a lot of thing happened lately and I really regretted that we didn't talk at all last while. Some kind of friend I am! We shared so much with each other before, about our goal, our view in life, our plan. And nowadays we just don't do that anymore. So today I just found out that my friend has been struggling alot with work, family and relationship lately and I really regretted that we never truly reconcile after the fight. I never stand on the side to support my friend when needed. I am glad I had this chance to chat today and hopefully our friendship changed again.

Tough Luck?

I had the worst luck as a project manager ever. Within a month, I have one developer's wife who needed to go to hospital because of stomach problem, one tester who needed immediate operation, one developer who had lung problem and waiting for operation, another developer who had diagnosed with virus. I mean how many project manager had to deal with that many people got sick in a month and all of them are serious sickness. :( Problem is I can't just replace them because developers need time to ramp up. Last project, both my tester and developer left the company. I have only one conclusion. The problem is me.

倒米

I don't know how to explain the term I used in the title in English but that is the best title I came up with for what happened to me today. So I decided to grab a copy of Harry Potter book 7. I didn't plan to do so this early cause I don't have time to read at all. But I am getting more and more scared that I would find out the ending unexpectedly from random people I talked to. So I decided I have to read it before someone ruined it for me again. So I went to a bookstore and grabbed a copy. When I was about to pay, the girl at cashier asked if I went to the supermarket next door. I was like, errr..nope. Then she whispered to me and said that it is way cheaper over there. I hesitated a bit because I was lazy and I didn't know how much cheaper. Since it is only next door, I probably should see if I can save a few bucks. Turned out it actually is way cheaper, almost like $10! I am pretty happy about saving money and I am glad that girl did me a favor, but her company probably wasn't too happy about that. :P

Expired Password

Even though it is for security reason, I really don't like that you need to change your password every couple months. I have two set of passwords so I used to switch back and forth between them. The problem is with my new company, they force us to change every few months and the worst part is you are not allowed to reuse the last 10 passwords! I have been trying to make up random passwords that hopefully I won't forget. Today was especially bad. I have been getting warning about my password about to expire. But I figure I still have few more days before I really have to do anything about it. So today I was at customer's office and I can't login at all! No VPN, no email, no nothing! I was like am I fired?! If I am, I am going back to sleep. I send an IM to my boss and apparently our company's stooopid system won't let people log in remotely if their password expired. I was like, WHAT! But I will be in customer's office for meeting and I can do nothing if I can't login to our system! That is stooopid! So when I went back to my office, I really can't think of new password anymore. But I came up with new way to generate password. Since my password contain number, I would just keep incrementing till I can recycle again. :)

The First Emergency Experience

The most exciting part of the night isn't playing ultimate. It is my first time going to emergency room! :D That is right. I was at UBC emergency room after my ultimate game :P I got hit in my left eye when I played the last game. I tried to catch a disc and the next thing I know is that I could hear a 'thud' noise and I can't see a thing. I was really scared it would bleed but turn out it is okay. Just everything is kind of blurry. After lying down awhile, I feel I am fine. But everyone insisted that i need to go check it out. My friend basically force me to go to the hospital just in case I was crying in pain later tonight. (I actually wasn't in pain at all, but a bit uncomfortable) So we went to the UBC emergency room. The funniest thing is that at the registration desk, the guy in front of me actually has eye injury too :P So we wait for 30 min or so before they take me into the waiting room. The nurse wanted to test my eye sight and asked me to read. Given that I am technically blind w/o my glasses (they made me take out my contact lens), I can't read a thing on the paper. I can only see a piece of white paper :P So I waited a bit longer and finally see the doctor. Luckily, it was only a scratch and it will heal in a few days. I am going to go back and check again on Thursday though :(. At least it is a minor cut, the guy in front of me apparently need to go to VGH right away to get operated on. Scary stuff!!

The Afterstory of the Nasty Email.....

So after that nasty email that my captain sent me, he sent me another one the day after personally. Explaining he didn't mean to be rude to add me in that email and he was just trying to explain things. I do feel better after seeing that email. Even though I guess it was probably my co-captain knock some senses to him, but at least it is "better" in a way. But I still want to tell him I was pretty upset about last email. So I draft up another one to him. This one more nicely written saying I am glad he emailed me again and I was pretty upset about last email but we are cool now. So whatever. But I wasn't sure if I should send it. Or I should talk to him in person. I mean the email tone is nice and sweet, a bit too diplomacy. After some struggling, I decided to talk to him in person instead. So today start off a bit awkward. I arrived but kind of late. So I quickly get into my cleats to play. Since the new girl showed up, he was teaching the girl on the play too. Eventually he came over and talked to him. So we had a quick chat on things. He said he know his tone may be a bit strong and he was a bit frustrated when writing that email. But he never meant to be rude. I was like alright. So we are kind of cool now. At least till end of season. I guess. :)

Suck It Up?!

When you play on a sport team and you got pissed off by your captain, what would you do? Would you just suck it up? Or you would voice your objection and just leave the team after? Here is the story. So my captain decided to add another girl to the team and asked our opinion. At first I said whatever, but then after more discussion, I said that we do have sub if needed and there is no reason to add an extra permanent girl. I thought he heard me, but apparently not. So next week I found out that he did add the girl anyway. I was going to just leave the issue since I played on another team. But my friend said I should at least voice my opinion again and I did. But I got no response from that email. Later, my captain emailed the whole team and said he decided to add another girl. I was kind of annoyed because he should have at least replied my email about my opinion. I think it is politeness, but whatever. And then last night he totally pissed me off. My friend sent him an email to voice her opinion. My captain replied and cc'd me in there. What frustrated me the most is that his whole email keep saying "some people should have mentioned it earlier" and "some people should have done that" when it is obvious that "some people" is referring to ME! Cause I was the only one added to the email and apparently I am the one causing trouble. I was pissed after reading that. I was like dude, if you have problem with me, say it in my face. What sort of freaking email is that! Are we a bunch of high school girls? I was sooo mad last night that I draft up a less sugar coated email and my conclusion was basically if you think I am causing problem, I could leave the team, screw you. But I also know I was really mad last night so I decided to sit on the email for a bit. I don't want to just suck it up. I want to at least say if you have a problem with me, talk to me in my face. Not that BS reference! So I am wondering, should I send the email? talk to him in person? just leave the team?!

A Big Milestone!!!

I really should mark down today's date. It is so important. Today is THE DAY that my boss' boss didn't change a single thing on my email!!! Seriously, it is that important! Ever since I started on this position, one of my main responsibilities is to write email, to coworker, to offshore team, to customers. Given that English isn't my first language and my email usually was to my friends, I used to be more sloppy on my grammar/typo. My boss' boss already gave me a "talk" on that. And basically any of my coworkers whose first language is English is allowed to "fix" my grammar if they feel like it (and some of them I actually disagree but I feel lazy to argue). And from time to time, I would need to send my email to the people above for proof-reading. It is very rare that my boss' boss did not rewrite my whole email. But yesterday, he only fixed two tiny grammar on my email. And today, nothing! zero! I thought I was dreaming when I saw that. My conclusion is either I am getting VERY good at it. :P Or he is tooooo busy to care. :P

Sneaky Sneaky

I found that my ability to write sneaky email has been "improved" ever since I became project manager. Don't laugh you people! I don't mean improving grammar. (My boss still likes to pick on that from time to time :() I mean to tone down and sugar coated an email. I seriously found myself able to do that faster and faster. And not bad too. I am not sure it is good thing. It became a bit too natural to me now that I even use it on personal email. That is no good. Today I was writing a whining email to my captain "expressing my opinion". I try to tone it down so I don't sound too aggressive. I sent to my friend to review and she was quite surprised I sugar coated it that much. I was pretty surprised too. I didn't even realize I was doing that myself. No good. Another bad thing is I found myself a bit numb when I need to lie in my email. The first time that I did that, I feel so bad about it. But today, when someone suggest we should "hide" that by lying. I actually feel a bit relieved than having to explain to people. That is even worse. I feel bad for not feeling bad now. I missed those days I just write bluntly to my friends at work and yelled at my boss in email. :(

Growing Pain

Everybody has been telling me to grow up these days. I have not been exactly happy with work lately. I don't really know what I want anymore. All my friends told me that is part of life. So just deal with it. My old company is just a special case. So welcome to the real world. And time to grow up. I seriously don't know how to answer. It is just part of life because work is part of life. If work is just part of life, why does it bother me so much then? Am I just being childish here and want to run away? Why do I have to grow up? Is that really about being grow up? Just to learn all those tricks? Do I really need to grow up? Am I still me then? Am I just being naive here? Not happy.

"Wild" Camp

My friend said I should just reuse my blog entry from the mission trip planning and replaced the title with church camp planning because I am on edge of beating up people again. That is totally not true. I believe I am pretty calm even though my fellowship has low response rate....until people start asking stupid questions. And I hate stupid questions. People start off doing that because they think it is funny to annoy me. It was okay in the beginning. But it gets less and less funny and more and more annoying when a lot of people doing that. Especially we are already stressed out by the low response rate. It all started with my church decide to have a summer camp this year. Real tent camping. Not cabin "camping". While it is no big deal for a lot of people, it is a pain for the people in my fellowship group cause they hate tent camping. The no shower, sleeping on the ground, staying overnight in the wild does not sound appealing to my fellowship. Pathetic as I usually am, I got sucked into the planning committee. Well, I volunteered myself because I felt bad for my friend when she tried to find volunteer from my fellowship and no one responded. I really should stop feeling bad for people. Anyway, as you can imagine, camping is too "wild" for my fellowship so not a lot of people are planning to come. Since my fellowship is the older group in the English congregation, we really hope more people would go to set an example for the teens. Today, I started approaching some of the people and hoped to force their commitment. And here is the conversation.

Person A: It scared me when you highlight shower and electrical outlet
Wiw: Why?
Person A: Cause it is like we are living a bit better than in a stone age that we only have shower and electrical outlet
Wiw: What?! I thought you people freak about not showering and that is why I said there will be shower!!!
Person A: Are we going to light fire with rock too then?
Wiw: (Take a deep breath)

Person B: Would there be Internet access? I think that is essential too. Same as shower and electricity.
Wiw: (TAKE ANOTHER DEEP BREATH)

Person C: I don't know about camping. Camping reminds me of bear, wolves, worm, insects. Oooh, and mosquitoes. Would you protect me if they chase after me?
Wiw: (Let me kill this person!! KILLLLLL)

Person D: Do I need my own tent?
Wiw: We haven't sorted out the equipment part yet because we don't know how many people coming. You don't need to worry about it till later.
Person D: That would be a disaster then!
Wiw: What? Why?
Person D: Cause we are not prepared. What if I need to bring my own tent? I don't own any equipment. I am screwed!
Wiw: (Exploded!)

So yeah, so if any of you are interested coming, let me know.

Wedding on a Rainy Saturday

Sorry guys. I didn't bring my baseball bat along with me today. So there is no unconscious dude lying on the floor of my apartment now. The wedding was okay. Nothing too exciting. The most amazing part is the food. My mouth is still watering looking at the pictures.

The Menu


The Wedding Cake
A very yummy chocolatey chocolate cake from Sweet Obsession


Lobster Bisque
Amazing! The white stuff in the centre was scallop mousse. Extra yummy!


Prawn with Spinach
The red thing on the side was tomato sorbet. Amazingly good! :D


Plum Sorbet


Pheasant Breast
I chose pheasant as my main course. Very juicy and tender. The sauce was pretty good as well.


The Dessert Platter
It had lavender ice cream, ginger creme brulee and chocolate mousse. They were okay but a bit too sweet to my taste.


Overall the food was good. I highly recommend this restaurant except it is in Ladner. :D

Good Job

My boss told me yesterday that my customer really like me from last project so they requested me to be on the next project. That totally cheer me up. I think I did an okay job but you never know what other people think, especially from the customer. I know that could be just my boss trying to give me assurance on the project. Or the customer just said that because they want one person to do technical lead as well as project management and in the previous project, I did demonstrate I could code. So they could just say that to save money. Whatever the reason, I do feel happier about my job. I don't know how this project going to go yet. Or how much suffering I need to go thur for this project. But it is nice to have someone pad you on the shoulder and said you did a good job. I feel retarded that I am happy for such simple reason. But it is nice to be that simple, I guess.

Geez...You are Single?!

I noticed it for awhile and I finally come to a conclusion: Married people hate single people. How else can you explain that they keep on insisting that you should go out and meet people? Either they don't like people to be different than them, or they have nothing better to do after getting married so "caring" their single friends become the next big thing. I start to have a feeling if they can actually physically drag me and another guy together, I bet they would do that. I am saying this because in the last couple days, I got nagged more than once by random married friends about not aggressive enough (rolling my eyes). I keep on insisting if I meet somebody, I meet somebody. It is not like there is a field full of single guys and you just run up and knock down the first one you saw and drag the unconscious dude out the field (hehehe, I do have this barbaric hunting image in my head). Anyway, I was talking to my friend today about getting wedding gift. I was telling him that I got invited to a wedding that I haven't talked to that person for ages. He insisted that I should go anyway....to meet people (rolling my eyes even faster!). May be when I attended my friend's wedding this weekend, I should bring my baseball bat with me and knock unconscious the first single guy I met. :P

Updated: Just after I posted this, some random guy from facebook sent me a message and asked to meet me. And my facebook picture was super weird too! HAHAHA!

Pockets of Joy

Someone once said you have to look for those tiny pocket of joy in life. If you always wait something big to happen, you would never be happy. So today I was happy about able to play ultimate (even though it is gloomy weather and I was lazy). I was happy to get off work early (even though I got in after 10am). I was happy to have time to stop by one of my favorite bakery and picked up some veggie bun (make me looked forward to tomorrow's breakfast). I was happy that my team played well (even though we lost again). I was happy to eat and chat with my team (even though the dip I ordered wasn't very good). I am happy. :)

Rich?

I got an email about this story long time ago and it kept popping into my head lately.

A very successful business man was in Greece for an important business meeting. During the trip he had a couple of days free and he decided to go to one of the islands for some fun.

As he was enjoying a walk on the beach, he notices a Greek fisherman unloading a boatload of huge fish. He decides to approach the fisherman and starts up a conversation. He asks the fisherman what he does with the fish. The fisherman replies that he takes them to the market and sells them. The fisherman explains how he gets up every morning around six and goes fishing 'till noon or so and comes back and sells them.

So the business man asks him what he does with the rest of his day. The fisherman replies that after he sells the fish, he goes home and spends quality time with his kids and then takes a mid-afternoon nap and then at night he goes down to the square and hangs out with his friends.

So the successful business man decides to give the poor old fisherman some "business advice." He explains to the fisherman that if extends his fishing to 5 or 6 at night he could catch more fish.

"Then what?" asks the fisherman. The business man explains that after a year or so of hard work, he could buy more boats, hire more fishermen, and catch even more fish.

"Then what?" asks the fisherman. Feeling a little annoyed, the business man explains that he could then move his whole operation to Athens and corner the whole Greek fishing market.

"Then what?" asks the fisherman. Feeling even more annoyed the business man again explains to the poor old fisherman that after moving to Athens, he can think globally, where he opens offices all over the world, where eventually he would take his company public making millions off the shares he sells and retiring rich.

"Then what?" asks the fisherman. One last time the business man explains to the fisherman that he would be rich and that he could then move back to the island, spend quality time with his kids and take those mid-afternoon naps and at night he could go hang out with his friends.

So the fisherman is sitting there trying to comprehend everything and then he says, "Why would I go through all that trouble? It sounds to me like I'm already rich."

Nemesis

My Tuesday ultimate team finally lost every single game this trimester. We will get to move down a division next month. Woohoo! (I am seriously happy about it. We have a bunch of new people and it would be good if we move down so we can work on playing as a team) However, yesterday’s last game was definitely interesting because we were facing our former team. When I first started playing ultimate, I was playing with this team called M. I played may be two years with that team and then my friend decided to start another team. Mostly because some of the guys on M were way too competitive. And that year, the captain left the team and the only one who would step up is one of the super competitive guys. Since both teams played on the same night, I picked to leave for the new team that my friend starting. And I know the new team would be more laid back and focus on having fun instead of just winning the games. In the end, we split into two teams and things got a bit nasty after that. The captains never talk to each other after. In fact, the captain from M pretended not knowing my new team captains. So you can understand why last night was definitely interesting. I almost expected there would be a lot of screaming and yelling. To my surprise, nothing happened at all. There is no screaming or calling names. I wish I could say that we beat the other team and got our revenge. It was in fact the other way around. But it was still a pretty fun game.

People Come, People Go

I had this topic in my mind for quite awhile. I kind of want to write about it but I don't know how to approach it. We always say friends come and go. But if you know you are drifting away from your friends, what would you do? Would you try to make extra effort to reconcile the friendship? Or would you just let it die off slowly? I think I have been doing later one. I would still go to the gathering. But I would just sit there and eat. I don’t care what is going on with people’s lives. And I won’t say what is going on with mine either unless being asked. I would then give a generic answer: alright, good, busy. I do feel bad every time I showed up at the gathering at that mentality, especially once in awhile, my friends like to say "we have been close friends for such a long time" I feel very guilty about it because I can’t say that out loud from my heart. I always wonder if they notice I have been just physically presence. One of the girls got engaged last year and apparently another girl was so happy that she cried when she heard the news. Another friend technically jumped up and down. I just say "congrats" politely. I was just not that excited. I didn't even cry when I heard my best friends got engaged. I was very happy for them. But crying seemed a bit overboard for me. Anyway, the other night one of my friends suggested we should do a speech on the wedding. My immediate reaction was to object. I seriously have nothing to say at all. I seriously drew blank when I tried to think of something to say at all. I mean I could BS if I have to. But I know it won't be from the bottom of my heart. I know it is my problem. And I have been distancing myself. May be I should just stop showing up.

Overly Excited?

My brother is in town this week because of his girlfriend's convocation. Yup, because of the girlfriend, not me. :P I asked him last year would he come back during Easter because I was trying to decide if I should postpone to get baptized till he is back. His answer was he is planning to come back in May and highly impossible to come in April. So I gave up and went ahead with my plan to get baptized in December. Frankly, I am a bit disappointed he can't come, but I guess when it is girlfriend versus sister, the outcome would be very obvious. Despite all the whining, I am glad to see him even though I just went back to HK in November. What I didn't expect is how excited my parents are. First my mom insisted our whole family go to pick him up. The whole time I keep thinking I could just go pick them up easily by myself. But I am not going to argue with my mom on that especially she insisted to go to the airport too. So my brother's flight is supposed to arrive around noon. My parents said they would call me before leaving their house. But I didn't expect they would call me exactly 12:00pm. Keep in mind they live in Richmond and it would take them at most 10 minutes to get to the airport. And they didn't even check if the flight was delayed. My parents were just anxious to go see my brother. I was being the lazy one and sat at home till I saw online that his flight actually arrived. I then left my house to go to airport. I wasn't particular thrilled that I had to park my car to pick him up. I much preferred that he called me after he got his luggage. But oh well. After another hour waiting in the airport, watching my mom walking up and down the hall anxiously to try to find my brother, he finally walked out. My dad then took his camera out. I was like, you got to be kidding me. It wasn't the first time he flew or first time he came to Vancouver. Why are we taking pictures! My friend jokingly suggested that my parents should bring a banner to say "welcome home" to the airport. Now come to think about it, my parents may seriously consider that if they thought of it earlier. I guess that is something I would never understand. :P

Only Girl

I start to think I am not a girl. Or I should say not girlie. I was talking to one of the teens the other night and she was trying to decide to go to a Christian concert or not. One of her concern is no girls are going. It is not the first time I heard girls saying that. Another girl from my fellowship used to ask if I would join for some activity cause she doesn't like to be the only girl. Somehow I never think it is a problem for me. May be I will try to see if my friends are going. But I never really concerned that I am the only girl in the group. May be if I go camping or hiking, usually I would go with my male friends. So I am kind of used to the fact that I may be the only girl. Even at my previous company, I was the token girl in development for the longest time. Not to mention that all my lunch buddies are guys only. I wonder what my friends' reaction would be if I asked that question next time. :P

Coffee House

I just came back from the coffee house hosted by the teen group from my church. I am simply amazed how they pull everything together. When I talked to their leaders on Thursday, it sounded like there is still tons to be done. But when I walked in today, I was so impressed. The decoration, the sound set up, the food. Of course all of it was nothing fancy. But they are all done by the teen. The leaders didn't help at all. They sat back and let them organized it. I did hear there was a lot thing done last minute but I think the turnout was awesome. And a lot of people showed up too. I got to say I am very impressed with tonight. When I drove home tonight, I reflected back the outreach event that we organized. May be we adult plan it more nicely and executed it better, but how come we can never get people to come? Isn't that the whole point? Are we just not comfortable inviting our friends? Are we all just too focus of making food or decorating but forgot the main point of these events? My fellowship did a coffee house two years ago. We did have great food and good decoration. But we only have two new people show up. I wonder if we can accomplish something like what the teen had today.

A Good Citizen

So I decided to call in ICBC today to report the accident that I saw last night. I am not sure it would help, but at least I did my part. One thing I don't like calling in ICBC is their phone menu. They should have a witness option. I don't even know what I should choose. (Pick 1 to file a claim...errr..not my claim..2 if you are from a repair shop..errr) After randomly picking the "Other" option and on hold for 15 minutes, I finally talk to a real person. The first thing I said is, I am not sure this is the right number to call, but I witnessed an accident last night and this was what happen. Here is our conversation:

ICBC: So do you have the license plate down?
Good Citizen: Err...I took a picture but the resolution was so bad that I can't tell the license plate now
ICBC: Do you know the make or brand of the car?
Good Citizen: Errr....does it help if I say the black car hit the white car?
ICBC: (damn this stoopid girl) Do you remember what part of the car contact the other car?
Good Citizen: (looking at the picture taken by the phone and VERY clearly described the contact point between two cars)
ICBC: (still shocked that there is actually some details to this incident) So here is what you said happen... (and repeat what I told him earlier)

So the ICBC personnel said they will put me on file as witness. But since I don't have more detail on the accident, they can't tell if someone has reported this or not (apparently there is no such thing as listed by location and time) And next time it is probably a good idea to put my contact on the car in case they do want a witness.

Accident

This is not a random picture of a car accident. This is something I saw in Canadian Tire's parking lots today. So I was about to back out from my parking spot. When I checked my back mirror, I suddenly saw a car backing out to an electric pole. I saw the car hit the pole and bounced back. I quickly turned my head and tried to figure out what is with the driver. And there is NO ONE in driver seat! I was like..what the hell! (It was broad day light! So it is not ghost story!) And then that car bounced and hit the white car parked in front. I was shocked to see the whole thing. Another guy saw the whole thing too and we can't believe our eyes. We waited for awhile to see who the car owners are but no one showed up. So I took a picture and left. Now the question is, should I call ICBC and say I saw the whole thing just in case? But I don't remember the license plate now. This is one weird accident!!!

Early for Church....Almost.....

I "almost" arrived at church early today. I am usually pretty bad about being on time on Sunday. I think I had only been on time less than 10 times last year. But today, today I almost arrived early. Almost. So this morning, I was still dreaming and turning side on my bed. For no reason, I opened up my eyes and saw my alarm clock said 8:47am. Since the Sunday service starts at 9:15am, I am pretty much screwed. So I quickly rolled out of my bed and rushed to the shower. By the time I was done and checked the time again, it was 7:00am!!! I was like WHAT THE!!! Then I realized that it must be just 6:47am when I checked my alarm clock. Since I am pretty much blind without my glasses, it is totally possible I mis-read my clock. Now I have 2 hours to get ready, eat breakfast, and go to church and would still be earlier than the worship team. Since I have so much time now, I figure I would do my devotion in the morning and watched a bit of TV before getting out the door. But do I underestimate my sleepiness?! I quickly passed out on my couch again (and without setting an alarm!!!) The next time I opened my eyes, it was already 9:00am. And I end up being 10 minute late again. :(

Mother's Day Dinner

This is what I made for mommy tonight for mother's day. It wasn't bad except not enough sauce and not enough shell fish.

Cornered

If someone ask you, do you think I am so-and-so kind of people, how would you answer? Or they ask you "people think I am so-and-so, what do you think?" The way that person phase the question is expecting you to agree. If you actually don't think so, would you speak your opinion? I actually lied when I got asked last time. Someone asked if I think he is a trustworthy person and my immediate reaction is "No, I don't trust you" but that would require some confrontation/explanation, and I am not ready to do so with someone I don't know well enough. So I decided to lie. I felt bad but then I really don't know how to answer. If the question is from a friend, I probably would give an honest answer. What would you do?

Ulti Season!

I can't believe I didn't post for a week. I have been crazily busy at work. But last two days, I didn't bother to stay overtime cause it is ulti-season! Somehow I feel very devoted to ultimate this year and signed on for two teams. The worst part is back to back, Monday AND Tuesday. I really don't know what I was thinking when I signed up for the team. Monday team is a new team I started playing with. I played with them in the fall, but that is only half the regular team. I was kind of nervous cause I haven't played and I haven't exercised for so long. I almost passed out during prat ice the week before. It actually wasn't too bad. When I woke up today, my body wasn't super sored. I was quite happy about it. But man, am I wrong! I played again tonight and my whole body was super tired after the first game. My right arm is tired and sored. I can't really lift my arm now. I am not looking forward waking up tomorrow. But I am sure glad both of my teams are pretty fun people. Especially my Tuesday team. This is the team I have been playing ever since I started playing ultimate. But this year half the girls are new. I was kind of anxious about the team dynamics. But the turnout is actually pretty good. I am looking forward to this summer. :)

TGIF!

I am glad this week is finally over. It was very stressful at work. I finally realize how service company is different than product company. In a product company, when we are behind schedule, we can easily decide what feature to remove to meet the schedule or push the schedule within the company. But with service company, it is not that easy. Customers always want everything to be completed perfectly and on time. And with software, it is almost never the case. So this week, we finally behind schedule and I have to update the customer on the progress. Since the project is very short duration, losing a day mean a lot. And for one component we are a week behind already and the second component we are at least 3 days and counting. You can imagine how tense I am every time going into the meeting with the customers. I am totally freaking out that my head will get chopped off right there and then. And I was relieved every time I walk out alive. Last two days was especially bad cause we are closed to a delivery date but from what we see on the test server, it doesn't seem working at all. That part was done by the Russian team and since we haven't worked together before, we haven't developed trust yet. I don't want to overreact without really understand how much work has done. So last two days I set up a server and test it myself. And I felt so much relieved after seeing most of the stuff are really working. Hopefully next week will get better. This is indeed more stressful than I expected.

Wanted: A Humanoid Punch Bag

I somehow really miss one of my friends from previous company today. Not that I am all emotional all a sudden. But because I really want to beat up someone today and he isn't around. I tried to use the alternative method which is to yell at him online but he isn't online this morning, which made me extra mad. When we worked together, I usually would stomp into his office if I am upset or anything. So I could rant, whine, complain, and sometimes (actually most of the time) use my plastic hammer just madly beat him up. That is part of my stress relieve. But we don't work together now. Who should I run to instead? :(

PS. My friend later got online and we chatted for a bit so I can get my frustration out. I nicely asked him to drive over so I could beat him up but he refused. How rude!

Всё о Google

It sure was extremely annoying that the network connection at work was extremely flaky last few days and the Internet connection was slow because of the proxy server in Russia and the connection was down at least once each day and I can't use MSN anymore and have to switch to web MSN (this probably annoyed me the most! but not just to talk with friends but I talk to customers too :P) But one interesting discovery though, which is I never know Google would redirect you to the local mirror site. And even blogger does that! I was completely amazed by it (I know I know, probably most people out there know but I didn't!) I guess Google detect the Russian proxy server and assume I am from Russian site. Even though that mildly amused me, I really hope our network problem will be fixed soon cause I basically have nothing to do if the network is down!!!!!

Happy Day

I am so happy today. Finally a friendly face at work. One of my friends started in my company today. (Though it is sad how happy I am for that loser to join, but still it is a friendly face) Even I know most of my coworker, I don't know them too well. I finally have friend at work :) I finally have someone I can go to lunch with. I do sometimes eat with my coworkers, but mostly I am a loner. But now I finally can bug someone when I am bored at work. So happy :)

And a perfect way to end my day is the email from my brother. He said he probably coming to visit in May. I am soooo happy now! Even I just saw him in November, I miss him already :D

What To Do? What To Do?

Somehow I think God keep teasing me today, or last few days. As I mentioned before, I am helping my church to organize a team to go to Peru. Though even from the beginning that I doubt we can find a team of 15 people, I am still highly disappointed that only 4 people can commit so far. Originally I have about 10-11 people said they are interested, but then they start dropping out either because of vacation or money issue. While I can understand that, I am still abit upset. My original thought was to still go but joining with other people no matter what. But some guys think it already defeat the purpose if we only have 4 people to go as a church team. So I was going to email the team and see what they think tonight. While I was sitting on my couch procrastinating on writing the email, 3 more people told me that they can join but depends on the date. I can't help to think, seriously God, do You want me to go this trip or not. If this whole process is just to teach me to be patient, it isn't working well cause I am getting more impatient. If You want to tell me that You are in control, then at least tell me what You want me to do! I want to get this trip going and it doesn't seem like so. And when I was going to cancel it, then more people said they can. I am really not sure what I should do now. I feel like having an anxiety attack. :(

Night Owl No More

One of the hardest thing with my new job is the early meeting. Ever since I started this project, I have to meet with my Russian team every two days at 8am. For other people, it may be nothing. For me, it is killing every single cell of mine. I was never an early person. When I first started in my previous company, I did go to work pretty early. I usually went in around 7-8am. But then I found out that I didn't really get to leave early anyway and I usually stayed pretty late. I may as well just go in late. Since then, I start going to work later and later. My usual time to work would be 10am. That way I won't stuck in traffic. I even refuse to attend meeting earlier than 10am. However, ever since starting this project, I have to get in earlier. I don't have an excuse to not go in anymore, especially I am the project manager. I tried suggesting to the Russian team to meet at 11pm instead, but people seem to more willing to meet at 8am instead. Aiii, I wonder how long my body can keep up.

A Letter

I got a letter from my second sponsored kid today. I start child sponsoring thru World Vision several years ago. My first kid is from South America but I never bother writing to him. Ever since I came back from Cambodia, I really want to do something so I decided to sponsor a second child from Cambodia. When I first got his picture, I was a bit disappointed because he wasn't very cute looking (I know I know, I am shallow). But I was sad after I read his description. His parents both passed away and he stayed with his relatives now. As people already struggle with daily necessity, taking care of another child add extra burden to the family. I felt so sad for such a young kid to go thru that (He is only Grade 1) but yet I know it is very common in third world country. Anyway, when I got his letter today, I am pretty happy. I never got a letter from my sponsored kids. He didn't say much except to thank me. But somehow that make the whole thing more personal. He isn't just a picture that I sent my money for. May be I will be less lazy and write him and my other sponsored kid back.

An Interesting Bubble Tea Experience

I went to a bubble tea place on the weekend which turn out to be quite interesting experience. You are thinking, "How interesting can a bubble tea place be? You almost can find 5 bubble tea places in every block in Richmond." Here is how it all started. So I was meeting up with my friends on Sunday for bubble tea. We walked in and the lady in the front desk asked if we have made a reservation. I thought "That is weird. Never heard that you need to make reservation for bubble tea before." So we said no and she said it would be 20 minute wait. Since we were still waiting for our friends, we figured it was fine. And then a waitress walked by. My friend immediately said, "We are staying and wait for a table. We are not changing places." Why? Cause that waitress was wearing a french maid uniform. We were all surprised to see that. So after we sat down, we were all very busy looking around. Except the front desk lady, all the watiresses dressed like a french maid. And the dress isn't very long so they can't really run or bend down. And half an hour later, one of the waitresses changed uniform. She now wore a traditional Japanese dress but then the dress was a miniskirt. So all of us were like "Wow, do they change uniform every hour? Should we order more food so we can stay longer and see how many uniform are there?" We are in this big dilemma how long we should stay. Later we found out from the newspaper posting at the front door that this place is actually a cos play cafe. They only have 3 uniform so far: a school uniform, a french maid and Japanese skirt. The owner was hoping to get more uniform later, like sailor moon ones. Definitely interesting experience, but I am not sure I would go back though.

If you don't know what cos play is, here is the definition from wiki:a contraction of the English words "costume" and "play", is a Japanese subculture centered on dressing as characters from manga, anime, tokusatsu, and video games.

And the History Repeat Itself :'(

I can't believe history would realy repeat itself. How many times can a person scratch her car against a parking column? For me, at least twice. Yup, in order to end the long weekend with a bang, when I drove home today after having dinner at my parents', I decided to drive my car against the parking column and see who is made of harder material. Conclusion: the column won! Lucky this time I didn't make a huge dent like last time (I was pretty sure I posted it in my blog before but I can't find it now) But the paint still got off and the scratch was kind of deep that I have to fix it or my car will rot :( May be it is time to think about getting a smaller car :(

Ready! Set! and Go?

I finally finalize most of the detail for this year mission trip from my church. That's right. I took on this role to organize mission trip for my church. I have been working with Samaritan's Purse last month to get all the detail finalized and now most of the thing is set. Now come to first of the hard part, to form the team. Every step into organizing the trip, I got more and more scared. First, I have to form a team of 15 people. My congregation has around 60 people and half of them are students. So 15 people is alot. I don't have the confidence that I am able to form a team. Second thing is we have to raise money for the project we are working on. For this particular project which is helping an orphanage to build a bakery, it is around $7000. I did gasp when I heard that number. Though it is not a lot to share among 15 people. It is still quite a bit of money. I don't know if people would be more hesitate about going. There are alot of times I keep thinking that it is so much easier if I just go by myself with any organization out there and why do I take on such a not easy role. It is hard to please everyone and people may not even be interested. There is very high possibility that the plan will fall through. Then all the work will become trash. Even like today, I prepare for awhile to do the presentation this week and since the sermon run over time, I didn't get a chance to do that. And next week is Easter special worship mean that I may even have less time to do that. And losing two weeks to recruit people mean alot cause the trip is supposed to be in July. I sent an email to all fellowships instead but I know how much attention people pay to email too. That basically mean nothing can be done much for two weeks. I know in the end it is all up to God cause I am only doing His work, but I have to admit that I am really worried how this will turn out.

Alzheimer's?!

I was originally going to write about my customer meeting experience. But a friend sent me something very weird today. He sent me a link to a website which contained a bio of me.

When Vivian is awake she is a Software Developer , surfing the net, playing badminton or trying her hand at squash. When she is not awake, she is asleep. (her words, seriously :)) Viv recently graduated from the Computer Science course at UBC and is working with the Easy Course Team here at WebCT.

While I think it is very funny, I had no idea who wrote this. The description sounded like it dated way back when I first started in WebCT. But I don't know people I worked with that well that they would make fun of me. My friend swore I wrote this myself. Someone in Support or QA compiled a list of bio together and it was definitely written by me. I really don't recall a thing. Must be old age.

Itchy Nose

My nose can tell you that spring has finally arrived cause I have been sneezing alot lately. After moving to Canada for 18 years, I finally got pollen allergy. A lot of people said that you will get pollen allergy after moving to Canada for more than 10 years. I thought I got lucky cause I never had much problem. I got tiny reaction from grass and plant, but that usually is problem when fall comes. And sometimes I sneeze in the morning abit but that is. The worst time was my arm swollen to double its size after camping trip and a week before attending a wedding. That time totally freaked me out and luckily it got back to normal size before my friend's wedding. I guess I finally use up my luck this year. Starting last week, I have been sneezing a lot, days and nights. I guess I still can't complain much since sneezing is the only symptom I got from my allergy. But I sneezed so often that I started to wonder if I got a cold or allergy. If I got a cold, at least I can call in sick. But now I still have to drag my dead body to work. Errrrrr.....stooopid allergy!

Couch Potato

It is very rare that I actually get to stay home on a Thursday cause I usually have fellowship. Since this week's fellowship gathering moved to Friday, I suddenly have a free night. So I decided to stay home and be a couch potato. I finally got a chance to watch the game show "Are you smarter than a 5th grader". It is actually not as exciting as I thought. Yes, some of the questions are pretty hard. I have to think twice about east hemisphere and I got the description of density wrong. But some of those questions are just plain easy. I can't believe the questions that both contestants walk out is sooooo dumb. The second lady walked out on the question which continent is also a country. Her answer was going to be "all" but she decided to take the money instead. I was like, you got to be kidding me!! But I guess it could be the pressure under spotlight too. And the host kept asking if you want to walk out with the money you have now would make you think twice if you got it correct. I guess I am a bit disappointed because it wasn't as intense as other game show, says "Who want to be a millionaire". In the end, it wasn't a bad show.

On a side note, I was looking for all the questions asked from previous episode. I run into someone's blog and I can't believe someone actually blog everything he watched. That is a real couch potato!

300

After I bailed out on my friend on Sunday, I decided to watch it with other friends last night. I wasn't totally interested in this movie at first, but enough people hype about it so I figure it doesn't hurt to watch. Turned out it wasn't too bad. Yes there is lots of killing and blood and simple plot. But it entertained me enough that I didn't fall asleep or kept looking at my watch (I think I am going to use this as a standard how entertained a movie is for me from now on). It wasn't as violent as I expected. True there is killing and chopping head and blood flying everywhere. And there is scene I did close my eyes. But I didn't walk out half way to get fresh air like I did for Saving Private Ryan. So to me, this is all good. One thing I would warn people planning to watch it. If you easily get annoyed by people talking beside you in a movie, don't go watch it with girls whose main purpose was watching half naked guys. My friends were giggling beside me the whole time and I knew what they were giggling about. :)

Miss You All

My ex-manager took short term leave last while and came back to work recently. I chatted with him for awhile today. Even though I complained alot when I worked in my old company, I do really like the people I work with. They are all good people. A lot of people said it is hard to make friends at work. I guess I am lucky in that sense. I made lots of good friends. I do miss working with my manager. Partly because we worked together for too long. During those X number of years I worked in WebCT, he was my manager most of the time. He is a very good guy. And a caring boss. We chatted for awhile today to update each other. It was always good to talk to him. Another thing people found they missed after leaving is the process in WebCT. I was quite surprised to hear that. I always thought it was chaotic. May be I was there in the very beginning so I can't see what we add on later is setting up a process. A lot of ex-WebCT people said that. I can't really tell myself cause my current company is mainly made up of my ex-coworkers. So it is more or less the same for me still. I guess we did have a good company. Too bad it is too short.

Prayer

A friend sent me a blog that is written by his friend. It is a collection of email/prayer requests that he sent during his mother fighting cancer, from she first diagnosed with cancer, till she passed away. My friend bet I would cry reading the blog cause last time when I was watching a video of our old instructor, I cried like crazy. But it was different back then. I know my instructor pretty well and this time I don't know the person or his mom. But the blog does bring back a lot of memory of what happen to my mom. Luckily, my mom won the battle. I am amazed how organized he was on prayer item. I don't even know how to get my fellowship to pray for me back then. I remembered my fellowship had a prayer meeting for me and my pastor asked how to pray for me. I actually wasn't sure what to pray for. I was mad, confused and lost. I totally understood when he mentioned the pain watching his mom suffer and the helplessness he felt. And the confusion with the doctor and surgeon, my family went thru the same thing. Luckily for my family, the battle wasn't long. It was quick and short. Even it was only several weeks, it was very tiring for my mom and my family. I still remember how scary it was to wait for my mom to do her test after a year. I didn't know till last minute that she had a test that day. Since I was unemployed then, I figured I would drive her. I don't know if my mom was scared at all, but I know while I was in the waiting room, it totally freaked me out. I keep praying and shaking. The scary part of cancer is you never know whether it would come back or not. And I was so relieved my mom is clear now. My eyes did fill with tear when I read that he sang "Amazing Grace" while his mom passed away. I am truly touched. I am totally amazed how he can still stay faithful thru all these. After my mom's surgery, my friends ask would I blame God if anything bad happen. I said I have no answer. I really don't know.

Sponsor

Reading from a friend's blog that her husband and her had a discussion about what would happen if their daughter wanted to move out with some guy when she is 18. The funny thing is this "daughter" is currently still in the mommy's stomach (the due date isn't anytime soon :P) This remind me another conversation my friend and I had. There was a sermon that the guest pastor said every couple needs to have 2.5 kids to replace the population. The two is to replace the couple, the 0.5 is for those people not getting married or having kids. Immediately after that sermon, several of us told the married/soon-to-be-married people to have more kids to replace us. One of my friend mentioned about starting a sponsorship program. Since this kid is to replace me, I have to pay for everything. I said only if I can teach the kid in whatever way I want and I would teach the kid to be so rebellious that would stress my friend's fiance out. Since my friend's fiance is actually those "do-gooder" type of guy, I said if it is a daughter, I would train her to go party every night and come home with different guy to piss my friend's fiance off. And if it is a son, then he would bring home different girl every night. My friend's fiance would have to screen all the call, be paranoid about everyone around the kid and stalk him/her. Another friend of mine would teach the kid to only buy brand names. The sponsored kids would become a nightmare for my friend and her fiance. My friend is actually pretty excited about it and said then her fiance would have to beg her to quit the job and stay home to take care of the kids. What kind of mother is that!

The Lost Tomb of Jesus

I am not sure how many of you watched The Lost Tomb of Jesus last night. If not and you are still interested, I know they are playing again this week. I actually find it quite entertaining, at least for the first hour or so. I can't believe someone draw a conclusion based on assumptions. The whole show is not trying to prove this is the tomb of Jesus. It is more like let's assume this is Jesus' tomb, and then see how all the 'facts' come in together and ignore other fact that doesn't fit in the Jesus profile. I actually found the most funny part is from the DNA test. They did a DNA test on bone sample from the tomb of Jesus and Mariamne (whom the director claimed to be Mary Magdalen) The lab concluded that the two sample are not blood related so they probably were married. I was like...hahahahaa..what sort of stupid conclusion is that. You can't use DNA test to prove the marital relationship. So where does that come from?! I actually found this show gave me even less doubt than Da Vinci's code. At least Dan Brown's novel brought out some good point for discussion. Anyway, here are more links on what others said about the show:
Toronto Star
Washington Post

Unashamed

I was watching a show on TV tonight called "The Collector". It is a show about a soul-collector who works for the devil. But he made a deal with the devil so he can try to help his "clients" to make amends during their last 48 hours on earth. This episode is about the main character trying to save a priest who is a very successful exorcist. He was successful because he made a deal with the devil back then. He sold his soul to the devil so he could preform exorcism successfully. Very ironic, huh? What touched me the most was in the end, when that priest can't perform the exorcism because of his own past. The junior priest ran in to help him. The devil mocked the junior priest for even dare to come over because he was just sexual tempted by a woman. The priest answered that he may be weak and he was not worthy to call for God's help, but as long as he has faith, God would not forsake him. It was from God's grace that He answered. What the junior priest said was so true. I kept sinning against God even I despise myself. But yet He is always here and opened His arm to take me back. How could He do that before even knowing me? I was so touched and started crying. This song lyric suddenly come so clear in my mind.

And I know I'm weak
I know I'm unworthy
To call upon Your name
But because of grace
Because of Your mercy
I stand here unashamed
- Unashamed, Starfield